Coming To Terms With The Impossible

(I feel prompted by the Lord to send this out again so I am doing just that! 🙂

We hear it, declare it, and believe it. Sometimes we doubt it, or react against it in anger when things simply don’t go the way we want. Nevertheless, it is clear in Scripture.

But He said, “ The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.
(Luke 18:27 NKJVS)

Today, I sat on the couch, upset by something I read on Facebook. All I could do was close my eyes for the umpteenth time in years and shake my head. I said to the Lord, “Lord, this is impossible unless you change this situation. It is impossible for women to lead in the Body of Christ in any capacity unless You make a way. Men don’t see it, won’t see it.” You may think this is a generalization, but it is not. It is truth. And, the sad fact is that so many women also put other women down in this regard, spouting off that women need male covering or any number of religious platitudes. So, as a woman in leadership, you can get this from both sides. Today is my day simply to be me and to express my heart.

With Brave Wings, She FliesUnless God changes this situation , (and I believe He is) the condition of women in the Body of Christ will only be seen on the peripherals. Yes, I know there are women leaders in the Body of Christ but they are few and far between. It is impossible to move out as a women apart from God Himself making the way. Please don’t get so spiritual on me that I hear “But God always has to make a way.” Yes, He does but He also uses people in the process. We are in this together but upon closer inspection, looking at the round of conferences, churches, meetings, etc. one could only see that the vast majority are men in positions of leadership. This is simply wrong and is not the heart of God. Let me say again, with all the kindness and grace I can possibly pull together. Women are in every sense equal in the Kingdom of God, able to hold any leadership, walking alongside men in every capacity, leading men and women, serving in any way God has called them to serve.

Will this every change? In and of itself?  No, not if women still believe they are little girls, always waiting for affirmation, covering, and someone to give them the go-ahead. That is not necessary and in no way am I justifying rebellion or independence, trying to push your way ahead or making a way for yourself. This is a multifaceted problem existing in Christianity on many levels and I am but one voice. Something deep is changing in me.

Today, I closed my eyes and just sat on the couch, trying to ignore it and be the better for it but inside I always get angry. I am so tired of feeling restricted and held back by man when God says I can BE in Christ and do anything He calls me to do. I am a strong women and feel this way. How do women feel that perhaps aren’t strong but have been beaten down years after year, being put in a place that is less then their God affirmed destiny.

I know I know. God is in control and he makes a way where there is no way and we should rest in his timing and his ways and nothing is impossible with God. I Know all the right things to say and how to appear graceful when I say it to avoid being called angry or some such things.

But today, I am tired. Christian platitudes won’t solve this problem. Neither will anger. But neither will staying silent on it either as if it is a point that has been rehashed so many times, it does not gain attention. Women are not second-class citizens in the Kingdom.

I got angry this morning. Now, please hear me. I am no longer an angry person flying off the handle. I am passionate about what I believe. And it is good to get angry but not to run with it causing damage to yourself or others. Big difference.

My own personal experience – I have been passed over for years, rejected and tossed aside because I don’t fit the mold. (Now to be honest, I was an angry women for some years ago but that is healed and I have made amends with people and asked forgiveness of them and of God.) So what is this rising up in me? It is an anger that is just grieved at being 60 years old and still seeing this same stuff in the Body of Christ.

God will make a way for the sake of unity and freedom in His body. I believe He longs for this reality of equality to be revealed in us and through us, our hearts totally transformed that in Christ there is no male or female……

Though she be littleWhat equally disturbs me is that women are not even considered as if they did not even come to mind as being qualified or able. Once I asked a leader why there were not more women to be considered for conference positions or church positions and instead of responding to me in grace, his answer was so condescending with a clear purpose to avoid answering the question. Then my husband asked and he acted the same way toward him, perhaps feeling sorry for the poor guy that has to live with me. (Sigh!)

Yes there are token women out there leading in the Body of Christ, and more added daily but it is a wearying fight in many ways and they are few and far between, at least for now. 🙂

God we need your help. Our hearts need to be transformed and changed. The Body of Christ is functioning at half its capability without women.

How does this affect me? I simply can’t make things happen in my life. I never really thought I could but perhaps there is a small seed in me that says, Be nice, be graceful, be a good girl. Don’t rock the boat. And this blog is talking to me more than you. I can’t do anything to help you to see or believe this but I know I can do a lot about me.

What to do? I can’t make doors open for me. I truly believe it is God that will do this for me and is already doing that for me. (I will be preaching in Oakdale CA in May, Oklahoma in May and also Kenya in August/September.) I will not wait, sitting around, looking for someone to affirm in me what God has already affirmed and called forth. It is a good place to be because my deep trust is in the Lord alone to take me where only He can take me. My eyes are focused on Him alone.

Today, I hit the wall when I saw this conference with no women. It is not the first conference that I have seen like that and I am sure it won’t be the last but something in me just exploded at the sight of it. I was volcanic in a good way. My own husband affirmed me as the lava flowed.

Coming to terms with the impossible? Look to God and Him alone. Move out, in confidence and assurance of Holy Spirit in me. Enough is enough. No qualifications, no justifications, no affirmations, no networking in the flesh trying to change things that will not change. Move out going where God says to go and do what God says to do with grace in humility. That’s the key isn’t it?

DebraIn Christ,


I will be sending this out immediately and again on Monday. Just to let you know. Just something I have to do.

2 thoughts on “Coming To Terms With The Impossible

  1. Been there….frustrated……and sometimes it creeps back in. However, in the last six months, there’s been a change as I have increasingly been made aware of who I am in Him and who He is in me. I have an identity no one can take from me, as it doesn’t come from “them.” I not only am a “woman” but I am an “old woman!”…will be 70 this year….way over the hill in terms of what most call effective work of ministry. But I no longer live and move by what “they say.” Recently I was led to attend a congregation that is so very different from where I have been the last 6 years…and all I was asked of the Lord to do…was “to be”. He clarified it by saying…Rest in Me Meri….allow me to be in those services all that I AM….instead of thinking there is something you are to do to change the atmosphere of this congregation. You rest in me, abide in me, hide in the Rock…and you free me and my Spirit to do what I have longed to do in this place. WOW>>>>>>it isn’t about proclamation, though I would do that as He speaks it into my ear….it isn’t about any of the “stuff” He’s even had me participate in when in previous congregations. Be my witness….let me bear witness through you as you rest in Me….WOW….there my sex, my age, my looks are irrelevant…because I know my destiny is Him and is a part of what He is doing. Now that I am even more limited because of physical issues, I so rejoice, because that limitation is only physical…and His Spirit is never limited to my physical condition, my sex, or age, or the attitudes of those around me. Because HE IS LORD of my life!! No simple platitude….worked out daily as I abide in the Rock and walk out my day “in Him”….repenting of those times when I pop my head out and say Here am I world….A mentor once called that hitting my head on the lid of the coffin. Dead meri is raising up out of the coffin…..and the result is only more death….

    Blessed are you Debra and God IS working out Himself in you in the midst of the persecution and rejection. He is raising you up as a “Son” in Him….where that alone is your identity NO MATTER WHAT anyone says. …and it takes a work of His Spirit to help us to have that daily mind set…as it is so easy to see what things look like in the natural. I know the power of God’s Spirit in your life and know that He is drawing you and working and molding you according to His plan and purpose….and you are being shaped and when the appropriate time comes….the way will be opened to you for the gifting that He himself is in you. Hallelujah!

    • Frustration leads to identity……..a very good thing for all of us. And, then to speak this out for other women who are struggling and under a bondage. Generations are called to minister together alongside one another and I will continue to believe that without compromise. This concept of youth ministry, college ministry, adult, women, children, men………so fragmented in every sense. You go – I know you will. Thanks for your comments Meri – we truly are in this together.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s