Creative Expression – Breaking It All Down!

God often speaks to me in one word or one-liners straight into my spirit. They can hit me when I least expect it or they can creep up slowly so as to infuse slowly over time into the foundation of my Christian life. The word ‘deconstruct’ has been in the slow infusion process in my life over the past month.

Deconstruct. Deconstruct. I hear it. I see it. I know it is working life in me to speak it forth as a source of encouragement and challenge. I am often a walking prophetic message carried in and through my life. In the past, I tried to ask God to do this some other way, but He doesn’t seem to hear me.

So I accept that I talk the talk only as I walk the walk. I impart to each of you that which dies and brings resurrection life in me so it can flow out to you in words of life.

Deconstruction. This is what God is doing in my life. What exactly does it mean? Let me show you first in this video. If you don’t see this video by email, just click on the link to go to the online version.

Deconstruct – selective dismantling of building components, specifically for re-use, recycling, and waste management. It differs from demolition where a site is cleared of its building by the most expedient means. It is referred to as “construction in reverse’. Deconstruction focuses on giving the materials within a building a new life once the building as a whole can no longer continue. It’s life construction, in reverse.

So, I am being broken down, torn apart, not for the sake of destruction or annihilation of who Debra is, but for the beautiful sake of reconstruction of who I am created to be in Christ. Some things just gotta go. He is tearing me down with His gentle hands of love to recreate someone greater with the life of Christ flowing through her. This verse comes to mind.

Christ’s life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not “mine,” but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20 Message)

There I am, laying in pieces on the ground. All my faults, my weaknesses put on display over the past years for all to see. The anger, the unresolved unforgiveness, the death of my sister, the near destruction of my marriage, ………there’s more but just a few examples will suffice for now. Right there in front of me, I see the results of a life broken beyond repair. Pieces of what could have been strewn around me. I fail to see anything that could come to greatness at this point. Who can put this all together?

There’s the deconstruction process. Bit by bit, piece by piece. Sometimes it hurt. Sometimes it lasted longer than I wanted it to last. Yet, all along, I submitted to it in various ways. Sometimes I cringed, got angry and threw things. Other times I simply resolved myself to the reality that I was a mess Better to bring it all down so that I can rise up again in His life. I used to get so tired of being me. Have you ever felt this way? Yet, things are quite nice right now, after years of deconstruction. It is tapering off a bit. Now, at this point in my life, I settle into stillness quite well, forgetting the noise of the world, coming apart to BE with Jesus Christ. In His life, I have life.

In this place of intimacy in Christ, He tears down, builds up, and deconstructs my life down to the basics. Down goes that wall of unforgiveness and anger. It serves no purpose. It is detrimental to my peace and my joy. Then bam, I am confronted with my own insecurity and down it goes, exploding quickly into pieces. I carried it for so many years, often using it as an excuse to procrastinate and withdraw from everything. Going through the house, He levels it all to bring it down to its foundation. There I am. All props gone. Presumptions flying into the distance. What’s left? Just the foundation. What exactly is that foundation? When all the props are brought down, there I stand in naked truth, barely recognizable yet so very alive. What now? Feeling so exposed and nowhere to hide. What now?

Well, it’s like this. I am being re-membered, put together oh so well to BE Debra. Bit by bit, piece by piece. What life has tried to steal, what evil has tried to destroy, God is restoring to my life in Christ. I cringe when I think that at my age I am finally finding out who I am created to be, walking in freedom and wholeness with each passing day. Why did I not get it sooner? Why now? Why the waste of time? Well, those words only show that there is always further need for some deconstruction, some tearing down. Deconstruction is a process that never goes away. I am always in the process of being remodeled and remolded for I am human in every way.

Here are some great words by CS Lewis that goes along with all of this. Enjoy!

Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of – throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself. ~CS Lewis, Mere Christianity,

In Christ, Debra

Please pray and consider having Rivers of Eden minister in your gathering, home group, conference or church in 2014. This is our year of release wherever and whenever God opens His doors bringing His grace and His glory through us to those to whom we are called in this season. Feel Free to contact us on Facebook, Twitter, or on our Contact Page on our web site.

Some Great Posts To Read

A Mundane Life – That’s All It Is! Living In A Hut Series

Robots, Clones, Templates – Where Is Creativity?

Creative Expression – Still Intentional, Without Any Religious Undertones

freedom-in-christWhen I speak about being intentional, I am not seeking to manipulate any favor from God through performance on my part in any religious striving. Yet, I also want to say that years of being charismatically inclined also taught me to strive for breakthrough or cry out in prayer rooms to reach that ‘tipping point’ of favor or release. That is not being intentional. That is striving. That is seeking to receive from God as if God was distant, unloving, uncaring, or simply not listening. I pray, I worship, yet now it is from a position of rest in Christ. There is a big difference, a very big difference.

I am in rest, knowing that God is intentional about loving me, knowing me, and having an intimate relationship with me. He sent His Son, Christ Jesus who walked in an intentional path to the cross so that when He cried, “It is finished” He meant it. It is finished. That is my foundation in which I receive what has been given to me in Christ. From that position of rest, I see His intentionality about me, in Christ.

When I walk in the intention of God’s pure love for me in Christ, I see and know that my life takes a wonderful path in which it is intended to be. I am His workmanship, in Christ Jesus. He is my creator. He formed and fashioned my life. In the finished work of the cross, my journey starts in Christ, not through works but in love and peace. I find my way in Him on this earth, neither by striving nor forcing the issue. I find my way by focus on Him and living, each day, each moment.

No, we neither make nor save ourselves. God does both the making and saving. He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing (Ephesians 2:10 Message)

To be intentional is quite obvious to me. Each morning I get up, renewed with life in Christ. My outward circumstances may shift and change with each passing day, yet Christ is alive. He is my life. That revelation takes time settling in my spirit. Over the years, my Christian walk was a contradiction to the finished work of the cross. I was such a striver, as well as a religious charismatic zealot, filled with exuberance to put more bondage on people in the name of Christ. To break those chains of excessive performance in me takes time. So, this blog is in process. On one side I am free each day through His life flowing in and through me. On the other side is how to move in this revelation, purging out all the good ideas that took me nowhere and landed me continually in dead ends.

Grace awakens me and continues to awaken me to the person of Christ and His life lived in me. There is no hyper grace. There is only grace.

There are no 10 step plans to achieve this revelation. Just believe it for Scripture affirms it over and over. It’s simply a matter of opening out eyes to what God intended for us in Christ and opening my eyes to the Living Word revealing the Word to me and through me.

My life still focuses on doing new tasks, assignment, and passions each day. I don’t sit around in a nebulous state of meditation, segregating myself from the world. That is ridiculous. My life in Christ means I go forth. I move out. I live. I touch people and the touch me back. Everywhere I walk. Everywhere I go, He is in me. In the processing of this truth, I am still in progress, detoxing from religion and saturating myself in God’s love for me and His purpose for His life flowing through me.

creative-sparkThis is where my creativity comes alive. This creative bent is so deep in me that the cry of my heart is to now walk in that deep flowing river inside of me. I may sound repetitious as I say this over and over, but it is only because I am in this process of discovering authentic Christianity.

What does the life of Christ actually look like flowing through Debra Westbrook or through you? I am not sure I actually know. For years, I followed the party line of the ‘right’ way to go, forgetting the passions in my heart that had been placed there by God. Now my Christianity is solely based upon Christ. In Him, I have the way, the truth and life. What I am discovering, as this excess is being purged out of me, is that place of stillness and quiet for this season. This place of rest comes outside even the confines of emotion that can stir me up but produce very little results in the long run. This revelation, so pure, so beautiful, Christ in me, the hope of Glory.